Choking on Silence A Memoir eBook Paul Tripp Teri Allen
Download As PDF : Choking on Silence A Memoir eBook Paul Tripp Teri Allen 
KIRKUS INDIE BOOK REVIEW
A remarkable journey of self-discovery and survival, as the author navigates a perfect storm of homosexuality, religion and military service.
Gay-themed memoirs have become more and more common, but this work stands out based on the unique circumstances surrounding the author's life. Tripp describes his childhood in Montana as a kind of war zone "Growing up in an alcoholic home, I was never sure where the beginning was or where on the path I would hit a landmine and have the evening explode in front of me." He eventually seeks refuge in the structure and discipline of the armed forces but incurs the psychological burden of having to hide his true nature. Tripp's inclusion of excerpts from his personnel file adds another layer to the narrative, underscoring his criticism of the massive amount of resources expended by the military in an effort to weed out homosexual service members. Amid the subterfuge, the author finds tender moments
of human connection as a lonely teenager working in a nursing home, a sexually repressed young man living on a submarine and a decorated officer approaching retirement. In fact, a submarine is the ideal metaphor for Tripp's odyssey He attempts to move undetected through largely hostile waters while facing potentially disastrous
consequences if discovered. The author also has a knack for explaining decisions that lead him to pursue "reparative therapy," heterosexual marriage and fatherhood. The only drawback is Tripp's fondness for well-worn or clunky similes, which will strike some readers as folksy or distracting. Regardless, this memoirfull of sharp insights will appeal to a wide audience--not only gay men, but anyone who wants to better understand a loved one struggling with sexual orientation and identity.
A powerful testament to the importance of self-acceptance and perseverance.
Choking on Silence A Memoir eBook Paul Tripp Teri Allen
I had such high hopes for this book! What Paul shared can help a lot of people struggling to accept/understand their identity. I've been in his shoes and while I didn't struggle with the Christian aspects as he did, the way he explained the cross we bear when living a double life was very moving and accurate. I definitely saw myself in his words throughout the book. The pain and constant internal battle is excruciating. It takes up all of your energy and spirit. Every ounce of your being is telling you getting out is the right thing to do. Yet guttural fear is holding you back. It's primal and all consuming. Days and years pass where you continue to follow the tide. Turn the other cheek. Rarely if ever put yourself first. Unfortunately living this way then becomes habit. You don't know how else to live. You plod on and on. Running on the perpetual treadmill of conformity; following a direction alien to you. What feels right and true and natural is forgotten and choked down by what is convenient. By what is expected. And yet you still make no changes. The right changes for you. Realizing that while painful and terrifying, sometimes your only form of forward movement is a leap of faith. That is literally what it took for me to move forward and let go of the fear. I learned it was better to make the move than be too afraid to.He talks about all of this in great detail. It's actually amazing just how much he accomplished given the internal battle he was fighting. But once he did get out, I identified so much with the joy and relief he talked about once he accepted himself. I was the same way. The other side really is a beautiful place to be.I really, genuinely wanted to give this book more stars but there were just too many elements lacking in my opinion. I wanted fewer details about the investigation and more about his feelings and relationships with his colleagues. He mentions his Father finally came around to accepting his sexuality. Why didn't he tell us about that process? I wanted to hear about what his relationship is like now with his son. I understand he probably wanted to keep that confidential out of respect to him but he could have given us a blanket statement. I felt such a strong connection with him. I liked his voice and enjoyed the book but once it ended I felt let down that some of the pieces weren't wrapped up. It definitely left me wanting more. That being said this is still an excellent read for anyone dealing with these issues. I wish him well and I'm glad he overcame his struggles and got to the other side! It's a very good place to be.
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Choking on Silence A Memoir eBook Paul Tripp Teri Allen Reviews
I am so glad I read this book. I always believed that homosexuality is not a choice.
I also intellectually knew that discrimination existed, but I never knew to what
extent. I am so thankful that Paul Tripp was willing to share his life experiences.
It gives me words and visuals to our lack of understanding as to what we do to others
through our negative judgement. I was so sad at the continuous investigation over years
that he had to deny who he is. I am so relieved that he is finally at peace with himself.
Anyone would be blessed to have him cross their path in life. I pray his son, Auston, is wiser than
his mother.
This memoir really touched my heart in many ways. I found myself trying to imagine a world where I had to "conform" to what the world considered "acceptable", but was against what felt right to me. This is a true story of bravery and courage, not only because Paul B Tripp has now shed the facade and is living as his real self, but so much bravery and courage to continue through so many years living in "hiding" in order to keep his job and try to please others. This book was hard to put down. Paul's journey was touching, sad, and also joyful. I also feel so glad that today's military personel no longer have to hide who they are in order to serve our country. Thank you Paul for blazing the way for others and then letting us all share in your journey. Highly recommend this book to anyone.
Choking on Silence is a powerful, powerful expose' written by a man who served our country for over twenty years, served his church for more years than that, and who by virtue of these two institutions was repeatedly forced to live an inauthentic life that often broke his heart and threatened to break his spirit. That his spirit did not break, that he somehow managed to find his way to a place where he could love and embrace the man that he is, is testimony to his personal strength. He certainly did it without the support or help of two prominent institutions in our society the military and the church.
Paul Tripp's story is clearly a must read for any young man struggling with his identity as a homosexual, but it is so much than a coming of acceptance book. This is a book that we all need to read, to either inform or remind us of our responsibility to humanity...for it isn't enough to just believe that gay/lesbianism is not a choice; it is not enough to accept gay/lesbian individuals into our own personal worlds; we need to do more than that. We need to speak up and take a stand against religious and military discrimination (against any institutionalized discrimination) that denies men and women their fundamental right as a human being the right to live their life authentically and honestly.
This is certainly a good book--it is well written and engages the reader, but perhaps equally significant--it is an important book that should be read by members of every church, every military organization, every educator and every parent. Paul Tripp's story ends well; not every person's does, and until the day when every gay/lesbian man or woman in this country can love and marry whom they choose and still serve this country or sit in the pews of every church in America, it is a book that must continue to be read.
So, buy your copy and then buy one for someone else and tell them to do the same. It's worth the time it takes to read it in gold.
I had such high hopes for this book! What Paul shared can help a lot of people struggling to accept/understand their identity. I've been in his shoes and while I didn't struggle with the Christian aspects as he did, the way he explained the cross we bear when living a double life was very moving and accurate. I definitely saw myself in his words throughout the book. The pain and constant internal battle is excruciating. It takes up all of your energy and spirit. Every ounce of your being is telling you getting out is the right thing to do. Yet guttural fear is holding you back. It's primal and all consuming. Days and years pass where you continue to follow the tide. Turn the other cheek. Rarely if ever put yourself first. Unfortunately living this way then becomes habit. You don't know how else to live. You plod on and on. Running on the perpetual treadmill of conformity; following a direction alien to you. What feels right and true and natural is forgotten and choked down by what is convenient. By what is expected. And yet you still make no changes. The right changes for you. Realizing that while painful and terrifying, sometimes your only form of forward movement is a leap of faith. That is literally what it took for me to move forward and let go of the fear. I learned it was better to make the move than be too afraid to.He talks about all of this in great detail. It's actually amazing just how much he accomplished given the internal battle he was fighting. But once he did get out, I identified so much with the joy and relief he talked about once he accepted himself. I was the same way. The other side really is a beautiful place to be.
I really, genuinely wanted to give this book more stars but there were just too many elements lacking in my opinion. I wanted fewer details about the investigation and more about his feelings and relationships with his colleagues. He mentions his Father finally came around to accepting his sexuality. Why didn't he tell us about that process? I wanted to hear about what his relationship is like now with his son. I understand he probably wanted to keep that confidential out of respect to him but he could have given us a blanket statement. I felt such a strong connection with him. I liked his voice and enjoyed the book but once it ended I felt let down that some of the pieces weren't wrapped up. It definitely left me wanting more. That being said this is still an excellent read for anyone dealing with these issues. I wish him well and I'm glad he overcame his struggles and got to the other side! It's a very good place to be.
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